Lover · of · a · Black · Angel

He turned and met her eyes; suddenly she was caught in a blazing green fire. His eyes glistened and she stepped closer out of instinct. “Farlest?”
He didn’t touch her. He didn’t raise his hands. He just gazed at her sadly.
She searched her mind but there was nothing from her previous experiences to help her. She took a deep breath. “Are you alright? What is wrong?”
“I have failed you.”
She frantically grasped for reason. “No! No you haven’t you have done nothing wrong. All along you have helped me, you have protected me, you have watched over me, you have nursed me, you have taught me….so much. How to cook, clean, love…and be loved. You have had unlimited patience with me and my…mental battles. You have been a kind, tender, caring, brave, respectful…gentleman…there is no way you have been anything like a failure. Oh, how can I convince you? Please stop looking at me like that! You have done nothing wrong! It is I…I the whole time who has been difficult and stubborn and…evil.” She dropped her eyes to the hem of her skirt and didn’t move.
“You know nothing of me.”
She jerked at his harsh voice. “Only because you have told me nothing!”
“How could I? I wished to protect you, vanima, from the evil, yes true evil not your pretend word, of my past.” His tone was like a small boy protesting for keeping his newest pet, a puppy, secret.
This is going so wrong. I wanted to come out here to tell him I love him and I want him to make love to me…and now we are fighting over unknown secrets. She spun on her heel and began to run from the forest. Tears ran down her face, hot and burning.
A hand grabbed her arm and whirled her around. Farlest caught her and held her by the shoulders. “Don’t run from me. Don’t run…I didn’t mean to get angry with you. It has nothing to do with you.”
She found tears coming from her eyes without permission. “I did not want to…it all went wrong.” She raised her eyes and stared at his face so very close to her; his perfect marble-like skin, the sharp contrast of his shimmering ebony hair against his cheek, and his emerald hard eyes staring at her with an unparalleled intensity. Her heart began to pound, her breathing coming fast as if she had never met a male before in her life. A small thrill of fear twisted in her stomach and her mind began to pour the small remembrances of ecstasy into the mix. It traveled through the core of her till it reached her mouth, escaping in a small cry. Without thinking, she raised a finger and traced his jaw line shivering even at that small touch. She looked up at him. “Why were you standing there, just now, you looked so…sad.”
He lowered his head and touched it to hers. “It is very hard to admit to.”
“Farlest…I am your….wife,” the word was so strange to say. “Please…I would be honored to know what it was.”
He looked at her and then sighed. “I suppose I can deny you nothing, vanima.” He ran his fingers through her hair and touched her cheek. “I love you so much. And I want to make you happy.”
“There is only one more thing you can do to make me happy,” she pressed her body against him and looked up at his face. “Take me. Love me.”
“That’s just it. I don’t know how without hurting you. Emotionally.” He traced around her mouth. “I don’t want to hurt you.”
“You won’t, Farlest. You won’t. I promise.” She hesitantly raised her hands and touched his hair. She played with it letting it slip through her fingers, the silky strands feeling good on her sweaty palms. “I love you, and I know you love me. You can’t hurt me. It’s already been done. You won’t.”
“Are you sure?” his eyes looked so worried and concerned she had to work hard not to laugh.
“I am most certain.”

He looked down at her, gently and lovingly. The incredible knowledge that she was his overwhelmed him. Instantly reacting, he dipped his head and kissed her, lifting his hands to cup her face, and he felt her respond. He deepened the kiss, his body coming alive, responding to her signals. She suddenly froze. He slowly pulled away, his body crying for more. He searched her face. She let her eyes skim around.
He settled back on the heels of his feet. “Sorry,” he murmured.
‘Lor smiled at him and touched his arm. “Maybe some lunch would be good.”
Farlest looked over at his brother who was grinning. “Yeah food would be good.”
Moraerlinn slung his arm around his big brother’s shoulders, and turned him in the opposite direction, “I want to hear about how you’ve been. I haven’t seen you in forever.”
Elissia stood where she was, shaking, watching them leave. Farlest looked back over his shoulder at her as he was literally dragged into the house by his brother. She noticed their similar appearance, but where Farlest looked like he could kill an entire army of Yirch, his brother looked soft and gentle.
And there was still something nagging her about his brother.
She took a deep breath, holding it until her lungs felt like they were going to explode, and then she let it out slowly. Raising her chin she followed the three men into the house.

After lunch Elissia left the brothers to their catching up, and went to change her dress into the other dress Farlest had dug out of the trunk. This dress was made out of light cotton and was like the dresses she was used to. She quickly slipped it over her head and stood in front of her window. She could still hear the men talking, all three raising their voices together. She opened the window and jumped up and over the sill to the ground, pulling her skirt over with her. With a glance back, she ran into the forest. She followed the path that she made the first time she entered this forest, and found her way to the pool of water.
She glanced around, wanting to do something. She paced at the edge of the water. “I’m so sick of feeling like this! Oh Tinu, I have to forget! How can I? I bear evidence of my life. I jump like a hunted deer every time a man looks at me. How am I to make Farlest happy?” She picked up a rock and threw it, hard, against a tree trunk. “I can’t act normal around him. I want to enjoy his touch, his love…Tinu…I don’t deserve love.” She raised her chin till she was staring at the sun, and let out a roar, a deep roar that tore at her throat, made tears rise in her eyes. A roar that echoed around her, terrifying her at the sound of it. She dropped her head to her chest and sank to the ground.
“Elissia?” Strong hands suddenly dropped on her shoulders causing her to leap up and spin around, her knife, always near, clutched in her hand and shoved against—
Farlest jaw.
She quickly let it fall to the ground and stepped back. “I’m sorry,” she gulped, her voice raw from having been silent too long. The forest was almost dark around her.
“Its alright, I should not have snuck up on you. I was just worried…you had been gone for almost six hours.”
Her eyes flickered around her. “I see. I’m sorry. I didn’t not mean to cause you worry.”
He stood still, looking at her. “You are my wife…”
She jerked her head at his whispered claim. “Yes.”
He came toward her then, his mouth meeting hers, and he pressed his lips against hers. She obediently allowed him to seek his fill of her, to sate his desire. She began to feel her heart turn to ice, her body to wood, she pulled herself into her safekeep.
Quickly, Farlest pulled back. “What is wrong?”
She couldn’t look at him. “Nothing. Nothing is wrong.”
He touched her face, rubbing her cheek with the backs of his fingers. “Where did you go?”
“What do you mean?”
He touched his forehead to hers. “You went somewhere, somewhere I couldn’t follow.”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about…I love you…”
“This has nothing to do with your love. This has to do with your pain.”
She simply stared at the ground.
“Don’t shut me out, Elissia. I want to help you….heal you.”
“I’m beyond help…healing…I’m hopeless.”
“Don’t say that,” his mouth claimed hers again.
And once again she retreated. His mouth left hers and he gently kissed her forehead, sighing. “Alright…its alright. Come…come with me.”
She trembled slightly, but silently followed him back out of the forest, toward ‘Lor’s house. They crossed the lawn, entered the house, the dark house; everyone had to be asleep, and into the room Farlest had occupied since they came to his friends house. He let her go in first and he shut the door behind him. She couldn’t look at him. She didn’t know why, but doing with him, what she had done with other men all her life, was different. She didn’t want him to hurt her that way. But she was his wife. And she loved him enough….what small amount she did have….to do whatever he wanted her to do.
She couldn’t…wouldn’t…look at him though.
She quickly unbuttoned her dress and pulled it down and then stepped out of her slip and underclothes. She couldn’t even look up anymore.
He moved toward her, not making any noise and came to stand in front of her. Quickly he shed his clothes and then reached for her. He took her head gently in his hands and kissed her forehead.
He took her hand as if she was a princess, “Come to bed with me.” He whispered gently. She shivered and let him lead her to the bed. She slowly lifted herself onto the bed and gracefully lay down on her back. He slid next to her and pulled her against him, so that she fit perfectly in the curve he made with his body.
Her mind was numb. She didn’t know what he was doing and that frustrated her, confused her. She always knew what men were going to do. But he didn’t seem stricken by lust, hungry and grabbing in his greed, or animalistic in his overwhelming desire. He was still treating her gently, like a lady, like a lady she was not.
She lowered her head to her chest. “What are you doing?”
He lifted his head and moved it till his nose touched her temple. “Trying to sleep….why.”
She turned and faced him. “You’re serious?”
“I’m sorry, m’lady, is there something I should be doing? Oh I know. You wanted a good night kiss…” he leaned down and gave her a light closed mouthed kiss. “Good night my wife.” He turned her in his arms and positioned her more comfortably, took her hands in his and held them tightly.
After a few hours, she drifted off to sleep.
In the morning she awoke to someone’s breathing near her ear. Male breathing. Male body against her back. She tensed and looked around, turning her body at the same time. She looked up into soft green eyes and felt her chest tighten. “I’m sorry.”
Farlest closed his eyes and pressed his face to her hair, breathing deeply. “Don’t be.”
She lay there, her face tucked under his chin, against his chest. She felt his breath leave him and come in, and automatically she matched it. She fell asleep again.
The second time she woke, he was gone, and she was alone in the bed. She reached around her and pulled the sheets against her. Oh Tinu, she lay her head against her knees that were pulled up to her chest. What is wrong. Her mind searched for something, anything that she did to stop Farlest form wanting her. What was wrong with her?
“Farlest,” his name came out in a whisper. “Farlest?” She struggled from he tangled sheets and reached to pull her cotton shift over her head. Turning the handle slowly she opened the door and left the room. She checked in the main room where ‘Lor kept his desk and many books. No Farlest. She checked the kitchen as well but did not see him. She went outside, tiptoeing over the dew covered grass. She followed the slight path Farlest left for her in the grass through the forest. She found herself next to the pool of water she had found the night before. Her black knight standing with his back toward her, shoulders hunched.
She stopped short, unsure of whether he wanted to be bothered or not.
She watched him breathe. Watched the spot between his shoulder blades move with every breath that he took. She wanted to run to him. She wanted to make him take her in his arms and cradle her gently against him. Wanted to make him love her. Make him touch her. Make him lay down and cuddle with her.

The next morning she awoke, the sunlight glowing through the thin cotton curtains that covered the window. She sat up, and looked around the room. She had dropped the skirts that she had covered herself with the other night, near the door. The clothes Farlest had given her by the window. She lay back down, her thoughts still spinning. How could she marry the man who she had only met a week ago? They didn’t even know each other. His father had sent him to kill them all. She was guessing his father wouldn’t welcome her with open arms. Were they even going back to his father? Where did he live now? Was he a wandering assassin? Not to be trusted? Was she any different? How could they survive? With him running from his father and she running from her past?
I hate this.
There was a knock on her door and she brought the sheet up to cover her body. “Come in.”
Farlest face appeared around the corner of the door. As usual, a shiver went through her heart. “You’re awake, I heard you breathing.”
“Do I breathe that loudly?”
“No, not at all,” he grinned, leaning his head back against the door frame. “I simply have exceptional hearing.”
“Ohh,” she laughed hesitantly, watching him, watching the muscles in his arms.
“Did you forget today we are getting married?”
She looked down at the sheets, her heart surging.
“Did you forget?”
“No!” she gripped the sheets. His face changed.
“Second thoughts?”
“I don’t want to hurt you.”
“I don’t want to hurt you.”
“You will come to hate me.”
“Never. That is my promise.”
“Beauty never lasts.”
He caught her meaning immediately and his knuckles turned white as his hand gripped the door frame. “Do you really think I’m like that?”
She angrily turned her head away from him and stared at the window. “You don’t know me!”
“I will get to know you.”
“And what if you don’t like what you get to know.”
“Not happening.”
“How can you say that when you don’t know! I don’t want you prisoner to a lie all your life, wishing to be free.”
He came in the room, shutting the door behind him; his body was stiff and his movements aggressive and intent. He got down by her bed side and knelt, although he was so tall his waist was almost even with the bed. “I swear it to you. Will you take me as your husband? I beg your hand in marriage.” He placed his hands on the bed, palms up, and bowed his head till his forehead rested on them.
She shuddered at his pose. Images of his incredible power played in her mind, and here he laid himself before her. She reached out with one hand and touched the black glossy locks that fell across her lap. A half sob escaped as she touched the soft hair. She bent her head and kissed his hair, her tears falling. “If you would have me, it would be my honor, my joy, my privilege.”
He raised his head, his joy and love shining so bright she couldn’t look in his eyes. He sighed deeply, and covered her mouth with his in a gentle excited kiss.
She pulled back, the taste of him sweet on her tongue. “Leave so I can ready myself!”
A half smile tugged at his lips, and he traced her jaw with a finger, and dipped to kiss her nose. “Alright.” He was gone.
She closed her eyes not thinking of what she was doing. She stood and let the sheet fall. Her skin prickled with fear and something else…excitement?
Freedom? Or was she selling herself into a life long bondage? She would find out only too soon.
She looked at the two gowns that Farlest had picked out the night before. One was a deep velvet blue the other was as black as midnight. She snorted at the irony, and slipped the black dress one. The inside lining was deep red as soft against her skin. She turned to look in the mirror at the other end of the room. The dress was simple. No extra layered material on the skirts, just the black velvet flowing to her feet. The dress was girded with the same colored red belt, also made of velvet, that wrapped around her hips and fell to the hem of the skirt. The only elegant part of the dress was the huge sleeves that fanned out at the elbow and draped down to almost her knees. All the other dresses she had ever wore had sleeves that fit close to her wrists; she had to get used to the bare feeling the dress gave her.
A knock on her door echoed in her ears. “Yes?”
“It is I, ‘Lor,” the familiar voice made her start.
She crossed the room, the skirts material swirling around her ankles. She opened the door. The other’s eyes opened wide, taking her in. She squirmed, backing up, fear lighting in her eyes. ‘Lor drank her image in. “You look…beautiful.”
Elissia dipped her head. “I know.” Her tone was dead.
‘Lor looked at her strangely at the sound of her bitter voice. “M’lady, you misunderstand me. You are truly, purely beautiful. You are an elf. You have an otherworldly beauty,” tears glistened.
“Oh.” She lowered her eyes, embarrassed.
“I am sorry to frighten you, I should have explained what I meant right away. You see, you are wearing one of my sister’s dresses.”
She visibly drew back, and grabbed the door. “I’m sorry! I didn’t know! I—”
“Shh…” he pressed a finger gently against her mouth, and gathered her in his arms and held her against him. His touch was un-suggestive, his intention completely pure. “You look so much like her. Thank you.”
He let her go and stepped backward, “Follow me. I will marry you both.” She saw Farlest’s leg showing in the doorway from the room behind ‘Lor. As she exited the room, he stood and came through the doorway. His eyes took in. His gaze completely different from ‘Lor’s. He fell instep with her as they followed ‘Lor through the house and out the back door to the glade. She looked up at him.
“You knew whose dress this was?” she hissed.
“Yes.”
She turned to face forward, clenching her jaw.
“Are we having our first fight?”
“First?!”
“I was trying to give us the benefit of the doubt…”
The three passed out the door and into the clearing behind the house.
Elissia stopped short and Farlest bumped into her. A strange elf was standing in front of them, head bent curiously; his shining black locks flowed over his shoulders. “Farlest?”
“Linn!” Farlest ran across the lawn and roughly embraced the other Elf, almost knocking him over, both Elves joined laughter, their voices eerily blended well.
Elissia looked up at ‘Lor.
“Brother. I invited him to come.”
What did you do? Fly over to his house in the middle of the night?
“I’m…sure Farlest is grateful.”
‘Lor looked down at her tenderly. “I hope you do not mind.”
“…No, no not at all. I only…I only wish I had a brother or sister to share such a moment with.”
“Trust me, Farlest is glad to see his brother, but not all of his brothers. The grass is greener on the other side of the mountain, all the time, yes? I am here to witness your beautiful day. Count me as your brother.”
She reached over and took his head, squeezing it gently, “Thank you.”
She looked over as Farlest released his brother and stepped back, talking to him, then turning and coming toward her. She let go of ‘Lor’s hand and clenched it at her side. Something about Farlest’s brother stuck her wrong. The sick feeling in her stomach bubbled up strongly, and she couldn’t even look at him.
“Elissia, this is my brother, Moraerlinn. ‘Linn, Elissia.”
She took a deep breath. “It is nice to meet you, Moraerlinn.”
He bowed from the waist. “Please, call me ‘Linn.”
“If you would stand here,” ‘Lor moved to stand in front of them.
Elissia smiled at him gratefully and moved closer to Farlest, till her arm was pressed against his. He looked down at her, an eyebrow creasing slightly. She bit her lower lip and then tried to force a small smile. ‘Linn moved away and stood to the left of ‘Lor. Farlest followed her stricken gaze over to his brother and then looked back at her. She quickly dropped her eyes, swallowing hard.
What was it that made her so uneasy about this strange elf? Who did he remind her of that made her so sick? She searched her memory, flitting lightly over all her encounters with men of his size and looks. An elf? She didn’t know what an elf was a few weeks ago let alone centuries. It could have even been someone she passed in the street or seen at the many auctions—
“I declare you both husband and wife, with the power given to me by the Valar.”
Elissia was jerked from her trance and glanced up at the dark Elf at her side. With a few simple words their relationship was sealed. A mysterious foreboding bubbled within her, making her tighten her lips and raise her chin to meet his gaze.

After they had eaten dinner, this time in ‘Lor’s dinning room, Farlest took her outside. The sun was beginning to set, displaying brilliant glorious colors exploding across the sky. Elissia caught her breath, she had never seen such colors, deep oranges, pinks and purples, in her life. She shivered, partly from the cold night air, partly from memories.
Farlest quickly took off his outer tunic and placed it around her, positioning himself behind her, he wrapped his arms around her, gently resting his chin on her head. “I love you.”
She was silent.
He stared at the sunset that was disappearing behind the tree tops. “I don’t want to force you to marry me.”
“You’re not. I just can’t say it yet. Those words are so important to me. I don’t know if I can say them yet. I don’t even know if I can love. I don’t even know if I am capable of loving.”
“You are. Take your time, love, I’m patient.”
She turned in his arms. “You don’t deserve this. Me. You don’t need someone who doesn’t know the meaning of love. Who is plagued by demons of their past.”
“Stop, hush. I want you. I love you.”
She sighed and turned back around as the sun disappeared. I will learn to love him, even if it kills me. “How long will we stay here?”
“Do you like it here?”
“Yes, what is this place called?”
“Valefor.”
“It is beautiful. Not bare and ravaged like the camps…” her hand tightened into fists.
Quickly Farlest took both her hands in his, still standing behind her, and began to uncurl them, kissing each finger tip as he did so. She watched him lift her hands up over her head to his mouth; the unfamiliar touch of his soft gentle lips stirred her heart bringing more tears to her eyes. Sudden desire, she didn’t understand nor had felt in centuries, flamed up, making her spin around in his arms and reach up to tug his head down. She pulled him down until she felt his lips on hers, and she kissed him, sweetly and innocently at first, but he encouraged her deepening her kiss, opening her mouth. His tongue entered, and deepened the kiss even more than she though possible. Her body began to come alive and hum to his kiss, emotions aroused along with physical longings contained all her life rose within her making it hard to breath. She couldn’t understand how his kiss was awakening her, but yet it was. She met his body with hers, pressing her pelvis against his, trying to find relief.
When suddenly it was over. He pulled away, breathing hard. She leaned her forehead against his chest, sobbing for breath.
“Marry me,” he breathed, “Marry me.”
“I cannot…what if I’m not the right one for you, it is too soon!”
“You are mine already, I can feel it. I can see the love inside of you, I just have to find the key that will let it out. Trust me. For now I have enough love for the both of us.”
She shakily stepped back and nodded once. Her body was still on fire, her ever sense aroused. He backed away, slowly, smiling. “Goodnight, fair maiden. I will see you in the morning.”
She watched him go and then turned to the moon that had risen following the sunset. Oh Tinu, what is happening to me?
She turned away from him and walked the opposite direction, towards the woods. There was a trail that led through the wood, and she though she heard water. The moon more than lit her path. The ground was bathed in the soft silver light and she felt like she was walking on a silken road. The wood was completely still. No nocturnal animals moved about. She held her breath, feeling the pressure of silence.
The path finally broke free of the line of trees and she found herself, quite suddenly, to be standing on soft grass near the edge of a pool. The moon had followed her to the calm spot, and now shone directly overhead into the pool. Elissia crept forward and glanced at the water, watching her reflection dance on swirls the slight breeze created.
She stared at her unkempt hair, smudged face and her rumpled clothing. How could Farlest even stand to look at her like this? He was a perfect prince, flawless, beautiful and majestic. She looked like something the dog dragged in. She glanced around her, out of habit, and quickly removed her dress. She stood naked for a moment, daring herself, letting the breeze caress her skin. When she could no longer stand, she quickly slipped into the pool. The water was deeper than she had thought, and she went under. She opened her eyes, seeing easily through the clear water. Slowly she swam deeper, spinning her body around, turning somersaults. When her lungs were finally about to burst she kicked upward and broke the surface, gulping air.
The moonlight fell on her, kissing her face with its cold rays. She treaded water, filling her lugs with air until her breathing was normal. She hurried to brush back her heavy, wet locks, scrubbed at her face and then pulled herself up the bank, where she stood to her feet. Her hair fell past her waist, covering her body. She turned again to look at the moon.
“I need strength,Tinu,” she whispered. “He will not want me after long. And then I will need to know what to do. I need strength. And wisdom. Help me….”
She looked down at her dress. The knife that was always near her glinted temptingly. She knelt and began to rip the skirts from the bodice. When she was done she threw the top half into the bushes, and wrapped the shirts around her like a cloak. That finished she headed back towards the house.
There were a couple small candles burning in the window when she reached the cottage. She knew they were all asleep, so she opened the door quietly and made her way to the bed room. She reached her doorway and was about to enter when a noise behind her made her spin around. Farlest stood watching her.
“Had a nice swim?”
She glared at him. “Bath.”
“Oh, alright, bath then,” he openly looked at her.
She felt heat rising to her cheeks, something that she had not experienced in over a thousand years. “It was…fine.”
He simply looked at her.
“Oh alright…I need clothes.”
He laughed softly and held out a hand, “That’s putting it mildly. Follow me, my lady.”
She eyed him, but his laugh got to her. “Thank you, kind sir.” She took his hand, clutching her skirts against her with the other hand.
He led her to the other room, where a large chest sat. He dropped her hand to open the chest. “I don’t know where he gets these things, but he has clothes for every race, gender, animal…” he stuck a hand in the deep chest and reached around. He pulled out a hand, smiling triumphantly. “Here you are.”
She took the article of clothing from him and looked at it. “A nightgown.”
“Yes, m’lady. What else for bed?”
“Thank you.”
He stuck his hand in and felt around again. A slow smile appeared on his face and he shook his head. “He still has this? Hmm….” He felt around some more and then took our a few more things. “Here, you can wear these. They are good for traveling.”
“Alright,” she sighed, suddenly tired. “Thank you for everything.”
“Elissia…”
She looked up at him.
“I love you.”
“I know. I know you do. I’m trying. I promise.”
“I know you are,” he tipped her chin a bit to the side. “I can see it in your eyes.”
She felt tears come, and before she even knew it, they were running down her face. “I am sorry.”
“Why?” his fingers were cool against her chin.
“I wish I could love as easily as you do.”
His eyebrows drew together. “Love…easily. I…don’t think love is ever easy.”
She pulled her chin away from him, feeling a familiar anger. “No. No love is not easy. It doesn’t exist.”
He took gentle hold of chin again. “My heart disagrees with you.”
Hers melted. “I’ve never felt love. I don’t know what it is like.”
He wrapped his arms around her head and held her against him. “I will help you.”
“I want you,” she whispered hoarsely.
He lowered his head till his forehead touched hers. A soft groan escaped his lips, and memory surged. She pressed her body against his, her hands moving and grasping. “Take me…I need you.”
He closed his eyes. “No…not now. I want you to love me…I don’t want to hurt you.”
“It won’t hurt me, I need…the feel of a man…” she grabbed his shirt. “Please.”
He could feel every curve of her body against him. His body flamed with the desire to take her to his bed. “No. I want to show you love without taking advantage of you like…like the other men did.”
She sighed and straightened. “Marry me. Tomorrow, have your friend do it; he said he was a bard, didn’t he? He can marry us. Then take me away…far away. Somewhere my nightmares can’t follow…and you can love me. Please.”
“Easily. Easily I can say yes.”
She smiled and turned away from him, entering her room and shutting the door behind her, leaning against it. She turned her eyes to the moon imploringly.

He looked fuzzy and she blinked to clear her eyes. “Its…not your fault…” she couldn’t talk clearly, her throat was thick and her tongue was heavy as a stone. His face was even more blurry, and she tried to blink again.
“Elissia!”
His voice was so un-welcomed and jarring, she was so tired, she wanted to just close her eyes. “I’m tired,” she mumbled and fell.
“Elissia!” he knelt by her limp body, and gathered her up in his arms, checking for a pulse. He finally located a pulse, it was weak, faint and irregular. “Stay with me. Fight to live.” He held her against his chest tightly, and began to run. Awkwardly at first, then as he began to balance this new weight, faster and smoother. His attention switched to his environment. He looked around him, watching for object that would hinder his footing, he knew he could not risk tripping.
Slowly the forest began to become familiar to him, he recognized the natural signs around him. He glanced down at Elissia, he was trying so hard to keep her still. He was racing against the poison inside her, his every breath was a prayer for her safety.
Her body was growing cold against him and a rare emotion swept through him: fear. Sharp freezing fear that threatened to over take his mind, but he fought by instinct. He was almost there. And she would be alright. He quickened his pace even more, carrying her faster than before, matching his speed to a horses’.
He turned down a worn path that led him into a clearing. “‘Lor! ‘Lor!” he cried running up to a small house almost hidden in vines and plants.
The door immediately opened and his friend came out, his face ashen. “Farlest!? Why are you here? What is wrong?”
“She is hurt, a snake bit her. I don’t know what to do!”
“Come inside, quickly.”
Farlest followed ‘Lor inside and gently lay Elissia down on a couch that his friend indicated. He knelt down on the floor by her head and pressed the hair back from her already sweaty forehead. “What can I do?”
“I have a few herbs I can mix together, we need to get the poison out, clean the wound where she was bitten. Start with that. Here’s some water…you know what to do.” He fairly flew from the room.
Farlest took the bowl of water and placed it on the floor next to him, taking a clean linen towel from a rack above him, and then searching for his knife. Sighing he reached over to Elissia’s hip where she kept his knife thrust in her skirt band. It occurred to him he didn’t know exactly where she had been bit; in all of the chaos he hadn’t checked the exact location. Her arm was bloody. He quickly cut through the material removing the lower half of her sleeve at the shoulder. He began to very gently clean her arm, removing fresh and dried blood. He worked as quickly as possible, his heart ticking the seconds. How long until the poison ended her life? He felt frustrated as his slowness, angry at his incompetence. He had been laying down while she was saving him and getting hurt in the process. He was supposed to save her life and protect her. He had done none of those things!
“How bad is it?” ‘Lor’s voice behind him interrupted his berating of himself.
“I…I don’t know…I…” the blood began to disappear and the long cut was revealed.
‘Lor bent to examine the wound, he gently stroked the puffy skin. “Far…this is not a snake bite.”
“What do you mean?”
“This is a single slash. Describe to me the kind of snake it was.”
“Thick, thicker than my wrist, it blended with the blanket.”
‘Lor tipped her arm a little getting a side view of the cut. “This is from its tail. Those snakes are called _____. Their poison is dangerous, but this snake didn’t bite her. They have saber-like tails that they slash their enemy with.”
Farlest sat back. “I am a fool. I had remembered your brother telling me about a type of snake that lived in your woods. That the poison was incurable. And then one year when I was staying here we saw a victim of this snake…I tried to heal him. I couldn’t.”
“You couldn’t have known,” ‘Lor but his hand on his Farlest’s shoulder. “You are not to blame. She is fine.”
The other began to wash the cut and bandage it. Farlest laid his fingers against Elissia’s cheek, stroking her cool skin.
“Who is she? I do not recognize her kind.”
“She is not a wood Elf. I believe she is of the mountains.”
“Ah…” ‘Lor looked at him.
Emerald eye met saphire. “Yes. I love her.”
“Farlest…”
“She needs me, ‘Lor. All her life she has been hurt. I can help her. She…she doesn’t even know she is an Elf.”
His friend glanced down at the girl. “She was a slave somewhere?”
“Yes.”
“Your father sent you on another mission?” the question was growled.
Farlest stood, sighing, and went to look out the window. “I don’t want to talk about it.”
The room filled with silence until ‘Lor stood. “I have finished, she will be fine, when she wakes come get me. I will get her something to eat.”
“’Lor.”
The other halted and turned, his hand on the doorknob.
“Thank you.”
‘Lor bowed his head. “My honor.”
Farlest turned away from the window, first closing the thick curtains to block out the afternoon sun. The room became cloaked in shadow. He went and sat on the bed as the door closed. Elissia lay, breathing easier, her face relaxed, free of pain. He took his two thumbs and gently stroked the skin between her brows. He began to whisper to her in Elvish. He took away her pain, healing her wound, taking away her unnatural sleep. “I love you…Amin Meleth lle…”
Elissia stirred, breathing deeply, and slowly opened her eyes. A face blurred before her. A male face. She was in bed. He was touching her face, stroking her neck, moving toward her ears
“No please,” it came out as a croaked whisper, her voice wouldn’t obey her. “Don’t!” this time it was a cry. She could not bear to loose her ears again. She was weak. She couldn’t fight him.
“Ai! Don’t!” she screamed, pressing herself back against the bed. It was dark around her. Where was she? “Help!”
“Elissia! It is I!”
At the same time, the door flew open, bringing sunlight streaming inside. A strange man ran into the room.
Elissia jerked back from the door and toward Farlest, now recognizing him. She grasped his tunic and hung on tightly, breathing hard. What is happening?
Farlest looked down at the woman clinging to him. Her body heaved in frightened gasps, her eyes huge staring at him, the room, and the unexpected ‘Lor. She was shaking. She was pressed against him. He took a calming breath himself, and then put a hand over her hair. “Its alright, love. You are in my friend ‘Lor’s home. He is taking care of you.”
“‘Lor, Elissia. Elissia meet my good friend, ‘Lor.”
She slowly unclenched her hands and wrapped them in the sheets. She turned huge dark eyes on his friend, “It is a pleasure.” Her voice was small and scared.
Immediately, ‘Lor’s heart broke. “Do not fear me, my lady. I would never hurt you. You are safe here, Farlest made the right choice of bringing you here. I will prepare food for you.” He bowed to her and left.
Farlest lowered his eyes to her trembling form. “Shh…its alright, melda.”
“I’m so sorry…” she whispered, her voice thick with barely contained tears. She drew her knees up till they rested against her chest. “I thought…”
“What?” his tone was so gentle, so tender.
She couldn’t stop the tears. “You…went to touch my ears…all those years in the camp…they used to…”
“Elissia,” he buried her head against him, trying to hold her as close as possible. She sucked in her breath, her forehead pressed against his chest, hating herself for thinking about her past. She shouldn’t drag Farlest into her dark memories. He had nothing to do with those who had hurt her! She felt him take a shaky breath. He was crying.
Panicked, she pulled away from him. He kept his head bent, tears running down his face.
“Don’t….don’t cry…please don’t cry…not for me…” she pulled at his arm, pleading. She began to wipe at the tears that fell from his closed eyes. “Farlest!” she let all her panic, all her fear, all her desperation fill her voice.
He opened his eyes, looking at her, his lashes thick with tears. “All I have ever wanted to do was heal you…not hurt you…”
“I know that. I…I know! You have not…not once hurt me. You are not responsible for anyone’s past actions against me.”
“No matter what I do, I seem to hurt you.”
“No! No. Don’t think that. It isn’t true. It simply isn’t true…but I don’t know how to prove it. Yet.”
Farlest leaned forward and took her face in his hands. She somehow sensed his intention and her eyes widened and she braced herself slightly.
“By the Valar, woman, what do you think I am going to do to you?” he asked in amused frustration.
“I have never been kissed.”
“Impossible.”
She blinked.
“I…I mean…how?”
She continued to look at him.
“Uh…alright. Well you are in good hands, I’ve had plenty of practice.”
She relaxed against his hands and flushed slightly. “You are arrogant.”
“No, not arrogant. Just well versed.”
A giggle escaped her lips despite her cautious eyes. And somehow her laugh gave him the answer he was looking for.
“Let me teach you this once, and we can practice for a long time afterwards.”
She sobered again and stared at him.
“Well I do intend to ask for your hand in marriage…but only after I kiss you.”
Her eyes widened again, but he stopped her with a little shake of his head. “Wait until I kiss you, I insist. We can all panic afterward.”
He moved closer to her, continuing to watch her reaction, but a little smile played on his lips. He ran a finger over her lips. “Relax,” he breathed.
Her lips loosened and parted.
He brought his lips so near to hers they almost touched. “We’ll keep it simple.” He cupped her head in his hands and slowly lowered his lips until they brushed hers. He pulled back enough to look at her. She closed them and bit the inside of her lower lip. Farlest lowered his head again and pressed his lips more firmly on hers, pushing against her, forcing them to part. He deepened his kiss until he felt her soften and begin to hesitantly respond.
Slowly he released her from his spell and pulled back. Her eyes were still closed, and she was breathing heavily, leaning into his hands. “You…can’t…marry…me.”
He became still watching her. “Why ever not?”
“I am not like you. I am used garbage. I am worthless.”
“Not to me. To me you are priceless treasure.”
“Why.”
“I can help you. I can see myself in you. I see your hidden passion for life. It is locked deep inside you, afraid to be let out. I can unlock you from your cage.”
“I do not want to be simply kept around so you can help me.”
He looked down at her. “You know that is not what I mean. I loved you from the moment I met you. I love your stubbornness. I love your intensity, I love your innocence…yes you…innocent. I love the way you think. I love you.”
She had begun crying again, shaking her head. “I want to say yes…but what if I let you down? I will disappoint you!”
“And I’m sure I will do he same. I am not perfect, I do not expect perfection from you…even if you are my angel.”
“Black Angel. No one could be blacker than I.”
Farlest only kissed her tenderly again. “Come, ‘Lor is here, eat your food.”

Elissia, warmed by her fury, could not force herself to turn around and go back to the safety and comfort of the fire. She stalked on, crashing through the forest underbrush, muttering angry thoughts to herself. She brought up every memory that could possibly cause pain to herself, berate herself, and call herself a failure. It wasn’t hard…her whole life was a failure. Every footfall brought back more memories, faces of the dead, every touch and sight of every man who had lain with her. Every betrayal. Every sin.
A shadow rushed past her.
She froze, feeling…listening…smelling. Yirch. She sighed.
The creatures had surrounded her, screeching and yelping, goading her. She didn’t move. In her minds eye she recalled them, their size, their features, their speed. She saw their eyes shinning in the moonlight, the gloss of their spit. “Go ahead,” she hissed. “Kill me! I have nothing to live for anymore. Nothing,” she dropped to her knees and let her hands hang by her sides. “Go. Now. Kill me! What are you waiting for?” Her hands scrabbled for a rock or stick on the ground and found a good size rock. She threw it in the direction of the loudest Yirch. “Get me!”
A low rumble echoed through the wood. She glanced up, sniffing the air. The Yirch moaned and murmured, shuffling around restlessly.
The rumble grew louder and then a roar lifted the hairs on her neck. She pressed her lips together. What now?
The Yirch screamed and scrambled around, darting into the shadows, their departure making the unknown creature seem all the more dangerous. Elissia turned and looked up to where the sound was coming from, still straining her eyes and sniffing. She found nothing strange and she could see nothing. The rumbling stopped, and for an instant Elissia wondered if silence meant pouncing, then she shrugged. She backed up from the tree a bit and crouched staring at the top of the branches, taking a deep breath.
She watched something drop and realized the shadow was right in front of her. She didn’t think the growl sounded like it would come from something so slight, but then she didn’t look like an assassin.
“Please spare me,” the even statement made her stomach drop.
“What?”
“Oh the sound…I learned it from ‘Findel…he thought it might come in handy. It did.”
She pushed herself up to a stand and started to walk away, but he grabbed her arm. She stopped herself from reacting.
“Don’t do this. To me or to you,” he spoke low.
She stared at the ground. “Don’t ask me to come back. What I said…was unforgivable. I…I meant it…but I shouldn’t have said it. I don’t want you to love me…you will only be hurt…I…I can’t offer you anything. You felt sorry for me so you saved my life and brought me with you. And I thank you, I don’t deserve that. But don’t ask me to come back.”
“Don’t wish to die.”
She looked past him, unable to bring herself to look into his eyes; they probed too far. “I wish to live. To live…do you know what that means? That means to feel something…to have some kind of emotion…even to feel pain. It means to experience things. To enjoy…” she trailed off not knowing how to go on. “How can I describe it…when I do not know the meaning?”
He let go of her arm, relaxing his fingers. “You want to feel again.” He swiftly brought his hand up behind her head and brushed his lips against her forehead. He pulled back, watching her. She felt the warmth of his touch slowly spread across her face, as if melting ice. She closed her eyes, feeling strange sensations that she had buried too long ago for her to remember. She felt him come closer again and she braced herself. He didn’t come any closer, and she opened her eyes, wondering. He was smiling. “It’s just a kiss,” he looked down.
She followed his gaze to find she had taken hold of his jacket in tight fists, causing her knuckles to go white. She dropped her hands to her side and stared at them.
“Hey,” he carefully raised her chin on his fist. She met his eyes as if they would burn her. “It’s alright. I’m on your side…we are together in this. So you rant about how the male lineage has destroyed your life. I understand…let us just say…the female lineage hasn’t been exactly angelic.”
She bit the inside of her lip.
“I won’t hold it against you,” he whispered theatrically.
A giggle escaped her lips and she clapped her hands over her mouth, eyes open wide.
He stared at her. “What was that? Did you feel something?”
She pressed her lips together meeting his stare.
He threw his head back and laughed, teeth shinning, hair rippling. She smiled against her will and held out her hand, which he took and led her back to the fire.
In the morning she awoke, wrapped in two blankets, and looked over to where Farlest lay on the opposite side of the fire. Last night she had curled up in the blankets as he sang her to sleep, his face framed by the flames of the fire. His smooth voice lilted the words with a certain undercurrent of passion; sleep claimed her quickly, allowing his song to be her background lullaby.
She stood and laid the blankets on top of him, watching him sleep for a moment longer, and then disappeared into the forest. She made her way to the river they had been following, stooping she washed her hands and her face with the icy cold water. Flicking her semi-wet hair back away from her face, she raised her eyes to the blue sky above, watching a huge bird circle, shriek, and drop in a dive. She smiled and stood, heading back to the camp. She took a deep breath, savoring the smell of earth and the trees. “To live again,” she whispered, hearing the distant mournful cry of the eagle.
She picked up her pace, thinking about a way she could make breakfast before Farlest awoke. She broke past the trees and started toward the fire, approaching Farlest. He still was asleep, his face turned toward her. She stopped and looked down at him. Something was wrong, the way the blanket lay, the way he slept, stiff. His eyes opened and she started.
“Farlest?”
His eyes warned her. She followed them as they rolled downward to his chest. She stared at the rolled blanket. It moved.
She looked back at his face. What do I do? What is it? She studied the coils. A snake…that was the same color as the blanket. She felt the grass shake and looked down. The sun glinted dully off of something in the grass. She looked closer. A snake! Camouflaged to match the grass.
“Don’t move,” it was a whisper. “Don’t upset them. If they bite there is little we can do to survive the poison.”
“What do I do?” she eyed both snakes.
“I don’t know,” it didn’t occur to her that he could be unsure.
She searched her memory, looking at the snakes. Eyeing her assets. Fire. She touched her hip where she kept Farlest’s knife. “Trust me,” she whispered. She slowly slid the blade from the material belt wrapped around her waist, and griped the handle tightly. Her legs shook. The snake by her leg twitched. She slid her eyes over and watched it, and then back to the snake on Farlest’s chest. “Don’t move,” she clenched between her teeth. She saw him hold his breath, and found she was holding hers. She inched toward Farlest and took a good hold of the edge of his blanket. “On my signal, roll to your left.” He didn’t nod. Didn’t blink.
She closed her eyes and yanked hard on the blanket, yelling “ROLL!,” and then let the knife drop. She continued to pull the blanket through the air, till it reached the fire. She felt something hit her arm, and pulled away from the fire and over to where Farlest stood. He stared at her. “Well done!” his eyes shone. She smiled in spite of the pain in her arm. She looked down at the blanket and snake shriveling in the fire, the other snake pinned to the ground with her knife. She bent to retrieve the knife and wiped it on her skirt leg, at the same time she glanced down at her arm. She saw blood had soaked the material. She pulled back her sleeve and caught a glimpse of two dark slashes. She felt a sick feeling grow in her stomach.
“Elissia,” she jerked her arm behind her back. “That was…you saved my life.”
She tried to smile. “You would have done the same for me.”
She saw him glance at her arm behind her back and then bent and picked up his knife stuck through the snake. “Where’d you learn that?”
“I made it up,” she bit her lip against the pain. “But let’s go. I can’t wait for that bed.”
“Alright, come,” he went to take her arm, and his light touch brought a sharp spasm of pain all the way up her arm, causing her to cry out suddenly.
Immediately she regretted her reaction. “Sorry.”
His eyes narrowed watching her. “Your arm…” with even gentler fingers Farlest brought her arm out from behind her back, eyes darkening at the sight of blood. He pushed her sleeve back and his eyes flew to her face. “You were bit!”
She looked away from his accusing gaze.
“And when were you going to tell me?” he sighed and dropped his mouth to her arm, sucking at the snake bite. She started at his action and the pain increased, she watched his bent dark-haired head, not knowing what else to focus on. He raised his head suddenly and spit out blood to the side, and then again dropped his head to her arm. This time she could feel his mouth on her arm and the sickening sensation of him sucking her blood. She tightened the muscles in her arm in response to the pain, “Stop, stop it!” She hated her weakness, but she didn’t understand what he was doing.
He lifted his head again and spit the blood out to the side. “I’m trying to get the poison out.”
“Why can’t you heal me?”
“I...I can’t. Not this poison. I…don’t know why. I—I can’t.”
She let out a breath, shakily.
“I’m sorry.”

She let him pull her up. “Sleep?” She glanced around at the Yirch. “What about…them.”
“We killed two of them, they rest will feast on them tonight.”
She made a face and swallowed hard. “At least they will feel no pain.” She backed into the cave, keeping an eye on the remaining Yirch.
Farlest watched her. Feel no pain. That was her definition of heaven. He pulled her deeper into the cave and sat down, guiding her down also, to sit next to him. “Here, rest against me. I’ll watch over you.”
“If we had…if I had slept out there tonight…” she turned to look at him, her eyes heavy and sad. “And I tried to hurt you.”
“Don’t think about it any more,” he brushed the hair from her eyes. “You are one feisty assassin. I want you always by my side. Not against me.”
She didn’t return his smile. “I will never again be against you. Ever. You have my word on that.” She took his hand and turned it over, laying it on her thigh, then she took his knife and looking up at him for reassurance, pressed the blade against his palm enough to cut his skin, and allow four drops of blood to pop to the surface. Farlest said nothing as he looked from her to the drops of blood, and then to the knife she held out to him.
“Seal it!” she said fiercely between clenched teeth.
“I know you won’t break your promise,” he absorbed her face with gentle eyes.
“Do you think I am afraid? Seal it!” she thrust her palm at him.
“I don’t want to draw your blood.”
“I am not afraid of pain.”
“It’s all you know, I want to show you different.”
“I’m not afraid!” She took the knife and went to plunge it tip first into her palm, but he stopped her. “Then you do it!”
He closed his eyes and heaved a sigh, then opened them and took the blade and set it against her hand. He felt her tense up and she craned her head to watch him. He moved only his eyes and caught hers. She tossed her head and sat back.
He wiggled the blade enough to let it cut through her skin and watched as two drops of blood beaded around the knife. He raised his eyes again. She gave him a short nod and took his hand in her other and pressed the two together, letting the blood mix. He saw her bite the inside of her cheek against the sting. “There. Now we are official.”
He saw a kind of vulnerability in her eyes that made his heart ache. This was important to her. “Yes,” he told her gently, stroking her hand. “We are official.” He turned her hand over and looked at the cut on her hand. He ran a finger over her small wound and the skin closed up.
“How do you do that?”
He studied her hand. “I have always had the skill. I can heal. It…takes a toll on my body whenever I do that.”
She fell silent until he met her eyes. Such eyes, blazing green fire. She could almost feel its heat. Its intensity. The emerald stone within his eyes continually sparkled, it was alive. And he loved her. “I’m sorry; I don’t know why I’m like that. I get so upset over little things…and they are so trivial and silly…and I’m so stubborn…and I always end up hurting someone…” confused and angry tears welled up in her eyes.
He played with her fingers. “It is important to you. That’s all that matters. There is nothing to apologize for. I don’t care. You haven’t hurt me. You won’t hurt me.”
“I always hurt others. I always do. It’s just…how I am…it seems. It’s so stupid, a promise sealed with blood…” she turned her head away and squinted into the fire.
He laughed softly, drawing her attention back to him. “No its not. Promises are important to you, as important as your life blood. You have had promises broken to you…countless times. It makes sense.”
“Why do you understand me?” she buried her head in his chest and sobbed.
* * *
The next morning they were both up at day break and on their way. Elissia said nothing, but noticed the Yirch were gone as were the dead bodies. She shivered and pulled the blanket Farlest had put around her shoulders closer. He glanced over at her, and she stepped closer to him for the rest of the journey. The next two days passed with out excitement. They were slowly making progress toward where ever they were heading. He didn’t say anything else to Elissia regarding his past, he didn’t ask any more questions, and there was no more talk of love. He stayed physically away from her, except at night when he gathered her up in his arms. She wondered if she had offended him when she had tried to seduce him. He was above any other man she had met. He didn’t look at her with the lust she usual found in the men’s eyes. He didn’t touch her in a way that suggested anything more than protection or sweet love. Where she first resented him or was confused by that, she was learning to love him more for it. He was letting her heal. It wasn’t that he didn’t love her enough, or didn’t care for her enough. He knew she had been hurt and abused. No one had loved her for her personality, her laugh, her conversation. No one had bothered to get to know her before they took their pleasure. He was. He truly loved her. She could see the affection in his eyes. She could hear it in his voice. She could feel it in his touch, the way he would take her hand, hug her, and guide her. She could feel her love for him growing by the day, by the hour.
The days grew sunnier and warmer as the year turned toward summer. She counted the days to be a total of about a week, no longer, but then again not shorter either. She was learning more about her traveling partner and that eased the days. She enjoyed simply watching him move about, fixing camp, cooking, or just leading her through the forest. Their last lesson was on cooking. And it didn’t go very well. She could make a stew out of some kind of meat, since Surrfag taught her survival skills, but being able to make other things such as bread or soup where unknown to her. She burned the bread and the vegetables in the soup scorched. She had tried to do something to hide it; she was more embarrassed than she cared to admit to herself, she should know how to do these things. Instead she knew how to shoot a bow, stab an attacker, and seduce a man: useless in the reality of life. He didn’t say anything, didn’t make fun of her, always the patient gentle teacher, adding to her embarrassment.
The other night he had told her about a friend of his named ‘Ros and how his younger brother lived in the forest. They would be stopping at his house. Elissia merely nodded, when inside she was filled with relief. Sleeping in a real bed again would be wonderful. She was able to survive being outside and traveling a lot, but it was wearing on her. She was not used to this kind of life. They traveled quicker today, she thought. Covering more ground than usual, he was focused on their traveling, not talking much, and only stopping a couple times. She had learn to respect his silence, since talking to him did nothing anyway; she hadn’t figure out, however, if he was brooding at these times, or merely quiet. His eyes took on a hard glint and his body would stiffen up. She enjoyed watching him even then, getting to know him more.
They ate the left over meat from the other night which he had made and still kept the silence. She enjoyed the quietness though; it was so different from the continual business and noise of the camp. She was able to sit and listen to the crickets, the frogs croaking in the pond nearby, the flapping of night birds, the small rushed sounds of other animals, the crackling of the small fire, Farlest eating besides her, his breathing, hers, her heart, the soft rustling of wind. It all touched her senses and she reveled in the beauty of the unseen.
She finished her meat and watched the fire turn to glowing embers. The air chilled a bit around her and she took deep breaths, closing her eyes and raised her face to the stars. She felt tears bite her eyes.
“What’s wrong?”
She jerked her head down to look at Farlest. “Uh, what?”
He didn’t explain his question; he simply raised a finger and wiped the tears that had gathered at the corner of her eyes.
“Oh…I…the night and the silence and the beauty…” she swallowed not sure how to phrase what she was feeling.
“I know.”
She lifted her shoulder slightly and then relaxed. “It is a foolish way to respond to beauty.”
“Foolish?” his smooth forehead creased a bit.
“To waste tears like that. I have a limited quantity as it is.” She attempted to smile demurely, but failed.
Farlest knelt in front of her, gracefully, like water. “Everyone responds to beauty in different ways…you cry…I…love.” She heard his voice shake with passion. And a single tear escaped from her eye and ran down her cheek. He breathed softly and caught the tear on a finger tip, watching her eyes closely. “I love you.”
She closed her eyes and shakily turned her face away from him. “Don’t, please don’t. It’s not fair,” she whispered brokenly, hoarse. “This isn’t going to last. Beauty never does. Don’t do this to yourself. Don’t you realize? I’m not like all your…angels in…Elf kingdom. I’m not a nice girl. I only destroy. I do not create. This…doesn’t…last….” She bit her lip, “And men only have the power to hurt. I hate men.”
She watched pain grow on his face and immediately felt hatred only at herself. How could she have been so open? How could she have had said that? “I am sorry,” she said with out emotion and got up and walked away.
“Angels in Elf kingdom…” he murmured.

The next bolt of lightning told him he was right, he saw the small glen where the cave was located and he turned to Elissia with a smile. “Is just up ahead, come,” he guided her around the low shrubs and to the mouth of the cave.
And he felt her freeze. “I’m not going in there.”
He took in her face and then remembered her fear of caves and felt his heart sink. “But, this is the only shelter we have. We must go inside.”
“No, no, I will stay out here,” her eyes widened in terror.
“You cannot,” he did not want to tell her why, he did not want to frighten her more, he just wanted her to obey him, and quickly. “Please, Elissia…please trust me, the cave is safe.” He could see she wasn’t thinking clearly.
“No,” her voice was hoarse. “No, you will have to kill me, I will not go in there!”
His shoulders slumped as he tried to think quickly, weighing out the consequences. She could not stay out here. She had to come in the cave. He sprang at her quickly, knocking her on the side of the head with his fist, where her Elven pressure point would be, but she side-stepped, and his blow missed its mark, and hit her in the jaw.
She let the blow twist her sideways, and she stopped her momentum by reaching out and grabbing a tree. She stared at him, her vision a red haze of anger. “How dare you?” she hissed. “I trusted you!” she touched her jaw.
Farlest didn’t back down, now even more he needed to put her to sleep, she was an assassin, he reminded himself as she snarled at him; she was dangerous. She reached into her shirt and pulled out a short dagger, his dagger, he realized as he reached for his, and quickly stopped himself from pulling out his knife. He did not want to hurt her.
She lunged at him, slicing the air with the dagger coming close to his cheek. He stepped back and kept his eyes on her.
She wiped at her jaw, pulling her hand back, blood smearing her knuckle, and then dragged her hand over her eye to wipe away a tear. She stood still, breathing hard, glaring at him, and then without a warning sound, launched herself at him, her blade striking out at him; it never lingered long.
Every stroke he caught on his wrist, blocking the flat of the blade each time, and he finally was able to lure her close enough to him to reach out and grab her by the back of the neck, and press his thumb against her neck, right behind her ear. She slumped into his arms, dropping the knife.
Sighing, Farlest lifted her into his arms and took her in out of the rain, into the cave. He lay her down on the floor and unslung his pack and took out three thin blankets and lay them on the floor. He lifted her again and lay her on the padding. He quickly went to the back of the cave, all the while watching her, and took a bundle of sticks and started a fire at the mouth of the cave. Then he knelt besides Elissia and touched her bruised jaw. “I’m so sorry. I did not want to hurt you. I am a fool. I was only trying to do what’s best for you, love. And in the end I hurt you, isn’t it just like me.” He closed his eyes and rubbed his finger lightly on her discolored skin. He felt the swelling go down and the discoloration leave. “There…” he soothed, brushing her wet hair back. “I’m sorry…I hope you will forgive me. If we had stayed out there we would have both been killed. We may still be, but we will have a better chance in here. I didn’t want to frighten you, do you understand? You looked so frightened already, and I knew you wouldn’t listen to me…I’m sorry.”
Elissia slowly woke, her head felt strange, and the world felt unsteady. She opened her eyes slowly and she didn’t recognize where she was. She studied the ceiling. Rock. She moved her eyes and saw firelight flickering, smelled the smoke, and heard the crackle of the wood. She raised her head slowly and groaned. “Oh…..” she put her head back down on something soft. “Far?”
“I am right here, melda. Lay your head back down. I’ll ease the pain.”
She lay back, presumably in his lap, and let him begin to gently stroke her head. He sang softly in words she didn’t understand, yet it soothed her and the pain in her head disappeared. Slowly she realized where she was. And she flew to her feet. “I told you no!”
He stayed on the floor. “You must trust me.”
“Trust you? You…you…you hurt me.” She touched her jaw, but the pain was gone. He stared up at her and she hated how his eyes saw her. Her whole body relaxed and she dropped to the ground not able to look at him. “I’m…did I hurt you?”
She didn’t want to look at him so he had to answer her. “No.”
She sighed and tried to smile. “I’m sorry,” she said to the rocky ground. It grew quiet for a long time and she could only think of how she had behaved. He shouldn’t have hit her…but she had acted like a spoiled child. He had done nothing to her at all, he had helped her in every way, he had risked his life, spared and saved hers. And this was how she repaid him? By hurting him and attacking him. Repay him. She knew that word well. Her skin turned to ice. “Will you forgive me?”
“Of course.”
“You have been kind to me, you have saved my life. I can thank you only one way.”
She stood, the fire to her back, and shook her hair out from its tight bun. The black waves fell around her, shimmering. She couldn’t meet his eyes and she wasn’t sure why as she began to slip her dress off.
“Don’t,” the harsh word stopped her. She looked for the first time into his eyes--cold and hard.
She realized she was close to tears. “It’s the only way I know how to make you happy,” she barely held her tears back.
“That won’t make me happy,” he rose and went to her. “If I know you are hurting.” He helped her get her dress over her shoulders. “I want to make you love me.”
“I…I…do.”
He tipped her chin back a little. “Not yet. Not as much as I love you.”
“How did I meet you?” she rubbed the backs of her hands on his arms. “I don’t deserve you. Or your love.”
Farlest’s eyes rose to over her head and she felt his body freeze. “Get down!” and she went flying behind him. She quickly rolled on her side and focused at the entrance of the cave. At first all she could focus on was horrible growls that frightened her enough without having to see the creatures that made the terrific noise. Farlest was crouched near the fire taking sticks and throwing them near the mouth of the cave. Elissia strained her eyes to see the animals. One jumped too close to the flaming stick and was illuminated by the orange blaze.
Elissia screamed. The creature was nightmarish. It had huge eyes that were covered with a thin membrane made up of tiny veins, its fur looked bristled and sharp, and its mouth was too large for its face. Two large fangs curved upward, almost to its nose, and were covered with yellow slobber that dripped from its lower lip. Its nose was flat and perched over the huge mouth and looked like it had been smashed more than once. The creature stood on two back legs, and had small curved arms that it kept tucked near its chin. It had a whip-like tail that constantly slashed to keep balance. And it was quick.
Three more jumped forward and then back into the shadows again, with such speed that Elissia felt like she shouldn’t blink for fear of missing them. She crawled back, getting on her hands and knees, reaching out for Farlest’s knife that was laying on the floor where she had been laying.
“Far…” she whispered. “What are they?”
He turned, concern lighting his eyes. “Yirch. A kind of…wood goblin. Are you alright?”
“I’m alright, I just…what are we going to do?”
He turned back around and looked at the creatures that dodged the fire and kept trying to run into the cave. The situation would be hysterical if not for the huge teeth and the sharp claws the Yirch were armed with. “Sit on one?”
Elissia looked at him.
“Alright, scare them away. Is that better, love?” he kept his tone light.
“Don’t…don’t joke about this, not now.”
“Then when?”
“Afterward! When they are all dead!” she almost yelled at him. She felt her blood rising and she knew what he was trying to do.
“And just how do you propose to kill them?” She saw the light in his eyes.
“Grab them and slit their throats?”
“They move fast.”
“Herd them to the fire, bait them,” her breathing was faster.
“They’re bigger than you think. Stronger too.”
“I can move faster than them. I’m stronger than I look.”
“Why waste your energy?”
She turned to the mouth of the cave, and crept closer, taking the dagger in her left hand. She crept beyond the fire, and she sensed him behind her. She edged closer to the ring of creatures and saw he was right. They were taller than her waist and while in a crouch, she looked up to them. She crept closer, past the flaming sticks. She felt his breath. She touched slime.
“Elissia look out!” his warning came too late.
The creature pounced and jerked, as Elissia fell to the ground, twisting until the creature was on top of her. Farlest ran forward and grabbed the creature and threw it off of her, sending the other creatures screeching into the shadows. Farlest lifted Elissia’s head in both hands, searching her face.
She laughed and pushed him away. “Stop it…look,” she pointed behind him.
Farlest turned, in a fluid motion ready to meet whatever was there, and saw the creature laying stomach up with a dagger through its skull. He stared at Elissia.
“You worry too much. I’m an assassin. I sensed him before you knew he was there.” A scream brought her head up, and Farlest rammed his knife through the face of a brave creature that leapt at them. Elissia laid her head down staring up at the now dead body of the creature, with huge eyes.
“Maybe you should worry more, assassin?”
She laughed lightly and gave him a worried look. “There much better, now come on love. Lets go inside and sleep.”